Tuesday, May 29, 2007

MAN OVERBOARD! DID HE JUMP, OR WAS HE PUSHED?

Drummond Bone-Head has finally resigned as Chair of the Capital of Culture Board.

Did he jump to go to a highly paid university sinecure somewhere more salubrious, or was he pushed over the side by fireman Bradley?

Whatever the answer - and there is much informed speculation about both possibilities - one thing is clear.

His departure brings to an end two wasted years, during which time his Culture Company Board have done a resounding bugger all to make 2008 a success for Liverpool.

Instead they have constantly re-arranged the deck-chairs on the Titanic (and thrown public money around like it was confetti), while watching helplessly from the rails as the ruinously expensive ship slides slowly beneath the icy waters (he's getting quite poetic these days, isn't he? ed)

The Maserati-driving Bone Head has been singularly unimpressive. His dull and listless performances have, at times, even made the Harbarrowboy look as though he has got half a brain.


Indeed he is only just trailing behind Jase in the 'sack him' demands from blog afficionados.

Bone-Head's main claim to fame has been cosying up to professional Scouser Cilla Black at some posh do for the great and the good in Westminster. This was in fact, why Bone Head agreed to be Henshaw's placeman on the Culture Company Board - so some of the anticipated (but still missing, ed) glitter would be liberally sprinkled over his benevolent shoulders and he would pick up a gong in gratitude from Gordon Brown's New Years Honours list for 2008.

Alas, for him both the glitteratti and the gong have failed to materialise (like much else that has been promised for 2008, ed)

So another departure from the Culture Company - first Robbing was given the push and then there was a night of the long knives for the other useless placemen and women who were serving themselves. It is bound to raise even more questions and doubts about the 'plans' for 2008. (But you won't read any of this in the Echo, ed)

Bone-head has been an utter disaster in charge of the do-nothing Culture Board and is jumping ship before he is forced to carry the can for 2008.

Which means, someone (Roger Phillips? Phil Redmond? Colin Cover Up? Cilla? ed) will now have to step forward to shoulder the increasing burden.

Talk about a poisoned chalice...

Betting for the new Chair of the Board: That bloke from the Phil 6-1, Mike Storey 9-1, Roger Phillips 25-1, Sexy Rexy 50-1, Stan Boardman 9-4 on, Tony Blair 5-4 (well he's got nothing better to do now, ed), Cilla evens, Jimmy Tarbuck 250-1, Sir Diddy 500-1 (and he was lucky to get the one, ed)

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