Monday, August 20, 2007

GOING...GOING....



7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Rumours are old Jase is now a resident of Spain and is off to the Costa del to run his businesess,also the rumour is that he only does a four day week anyway as he flies off to spain every thursday night.

Anonymous said...

how come the culture company with over 100 staff cannot put on the mathew street festival ? one man leaves and even with three months to go it all goes belly up?

Anonymous said...

becaus its run by a dick head

Mower said...

why have you forgotten cover up's role in all this. he must have known what was going on with matthew street - but he did bugger all too.

Voter said...

So Bradley fired him and two weeks later he is still in employment here larger than life.

Perhaps if Chief Nelly Bradley could find his backbone then Harbarowboy might have believed him and actually gone.

Chuck El Butteo said...

Just to put eh record straight with all this rubbish appearing in the Echo.

This morning, we all had to assemble in The Sundown Room of Millennium House for an official address. A man wearing a safari suit walked in carrying a dart rifle and told us that he required absolute silence before we could start. On achieving this he radioed the message " Ole,Ole, Ole" and the doors burst open with two men entering wearing white boiler suits, protective face masks and carrying a stretcher.

On the stretcher was a large heavy sack with padlock and chain, a bit like an escapologist trick. One of the men carefully unlocked it and unwound the chain leaving the top of the sack open. He quickly stepped back.

We were all really tense wondering what the hell was happening when the sack began to move causing one of our team to scream. She was quickly bludgeoned across the back of the neck by one of the boiler suited men who said "quiet you will scare it" and she fell to the floor unconscious.

We were too afraid to do anything and we forgot all about her as the sack began to move and suddenly fell open.

There before us was Jason, he was dressed only in a heavily stained vest, with holes in it and a pair of shiny track-suit bottoms too short in the leg. He had to grip the waist to stop them falling down. On his feet was a pair of green sponge hospital slippers. He had black circles around his eyes and what looked like porridge at the corners of his mouth, he clearly had not shaved for several days.

There was no movement from him apart from his eyes darting around pausing on individuals.

One of the men in the boiler suit then poked him in the side with a stick and Jason shouted in an urgent,strained throaty voice
"It wasn't me!" The men in boiler suits gestured for us to applaud, which we did.

We could see tears forming in Jas's eyes. It was awful!

Then the guy with the dart gun took aim and fired a dart into Jason’s neck. He reacted with an almost reptilian screech and tried to run but the tranquilliser was so powerful that he got no more than a couple of feet before he collapsed motionless, just breathing noisily and saliva dripping from the side of his mouth onto the table. There seemed to b steam coming off his body. They then grabbed his ankles and slid his body along the meeting room table and bundled him into the sack and back onto the stretcher.

The guy radioed again saying “Viva Espagnia retuning to Hacienda”.

The stretcher was taken out and the guy with the gun said "Thank you all for your co-operation now back to work". He left the room and we stood in silence for a few moments looking at the small pool of saliva that trailed along the table where they had dragged him. Then Clare said, “well I think that was really encouraging, it shows that we are still a strong team and things are nowhere near as bad as the press want to make out. It convinces me that 2008 is going to be fantastically amazingly brilliant”. We all nodded and went back to work.

The rest of the day we spent trying to think of exciting events for 2008. We have incidentally, come up with brilliant one to really involve the public. It is decorating and turning all wheelie bins into Liverbirds and having a parade. It combines the arts with environmental concerns and it is going to be amazingly fantastically brilliant!

So there you are. Forget what they say in the Echo and get involved with us. You can help by joining in our mantra "2008 will be great" if we could get the whole population to chant it together at the same time it could really make it happpen. honestly i read about it in a book by Uri Geller....God I hope it works!

2008 will be great..2008 will be great....2008 will be great...

Tori Blare said...

To Chuck El Buttio, son of the prof, I have an absolutely 08 will be great idea that could be linked up to your wheelie bin idea!
What about effigies of public figures throughout Liverpool History, sitting in the wheelie bins?
Wait there is more..
We could parade through the streets,(those without roadworks and other perilous things), at the front of the parade could be,
Bradley
Hilton
El Jase
Henshaw
Mad dog Mcgolden shower
Chas and the coleminers
Storey
Robbing Archer
Hasitall
Liberal Democrats
Florence Clucas
Florence Clucas chins

Other names to be confirmed!!!
They could all be at the front and we could then ceremoniously push them all into the river Mersey!!

2008 will defo be great then!

How the council use Ripa to spy on you....

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